Yes, as time grows short and the Gods above put man in play below, the two great political titans of the left, Hillary Clinton and al Gore, seem destined to square off against each other in the blood flecked and death adorned presidential coliseum of 2008.
all the auguries are there. and famed political diviners are busily opening chickens, doves, and mice, checking their entrails for e-mail from the gods, while others scan the clouds for other signs, and scientists train telescopes on the tails of comets.
There's al's hit movie, which features a tear soaked plethora of inconveniences for all of us, his accompanying Willy Loman pitchman's travails on the endless road and highways in the sky, and his tireless flogging of it to all comers.
Everywhere there's a suitable venue, a tent, or an open air park with electricity and a branch to hang his wrinkled white sheet, you'll find Mr. Gore and the townsfolk gathered to watch the grainy moving pictures and the disembodied voice of the narration.
and, of course, in better venues, you'll see al's Mars attacks delivery, as his voice spans the octaves from a soothing low whisper, at the beginning of his spirited ululation, to glass shattering shrieks, at the end of his mood ring destroying tribulation.
Then we have Hillary and her keen intelligence, her sixth political sense, her multiplicity of wardrobes, her savoir faire, lawyerly grasp, and ability to spy a useable tax write-off.
Yes, Hillary can set fire to just as many audiences as Fighting al.
Why, just the other day she tripped the light fantastic at the National Press Club. The Big She really poured it on about her wide and all encompassing centralized plans for "geologic carbon sequestration," which she pounded home, in no uncertain terms, to all the David Gregory mummers that could possibly be packed into the place, nine at a time at a table for four.
But they don't always nod off for Hillary, sometimes she can freeze them solid. In tighter venues she'll send her stickmen into the crowd to poke people awake with their long staves if attention drifts.
There is an old proverb which has come down to us from Friedrich Nietzsche, courtesy of his brief novella, So sprach Zarathustra, "Those that the gods want to punish, they first drive mad."
It is said that Mr. Gore keeps an abridged copy of this epic in his travel bag, so that the folks who line up to shake his hand after another showing of his upcoming Oscar winner--it's as good as anything that the trompe-l'oeil fabricating Mr. Michael Moore has ever cobbled together, the pundits say-- can catch a glimpse of the myriad catacombs inhabiting his mind.
Mr. Gore maintains a cerebrum where Nietzsche is free to roam, unlike the buffalos wandering in Mr. Hunter Thompson's former mind, and the cheap dime store perfume soaked fictional burlesque which troubles much of Mr. Moore's gray material.
Mrs. Clinton, on the other hand, has a bigger traveling staff than Mr. Gore, and insists that someone in her thrall carry a hefty unabridged edition of Zarathustra's musings at all times, to demonstrate her intellect.
Mrs. Clinton has a mind like a steel trap, her staff says, and a brain that is bigger than Mr. Gore's, but her staff is paid to recount this fact. However her thought centers are a great deal larger than Mr. Moore's cerebrum, cerebellum and oblongata combined, and have been measured so. and Mr. Moore is lacking a great deal of that which both Hillary and al possess--the sense to stop sloshing around in rain soaked sneakers, in a dirty ball cap, with a five-day growth in a downpour.
So, it will be a clash of the Titans when these two meet and battle to carry the torch.
They will enter the arena, wary of each other.
al will carry the trident and the net, while Hillary will don the helmet, sword and buckler.
Gore will try to trip up his opponent with his net, spearing her when she's down, while Hillary will close with her head down, warding off the trident with her shield, going for his vitals with her short sword.
It will be a vicious contest and many wounds will be suffered.
Does Mr. Gore have the stomach and the will to fight Hillary Clinton up close and personal, with no holds barred?
His handlers say he's a new man and won't be micromanaged this time around--no Vanity Fair doo-dads and enhanced jeans and all--apparently ready to go to his death willingly.
Hillary is always ready to destroy her opponents. Will al let himself be trampled?
Only time will tell and only the gods know the outcome of this clash of the Titans.
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