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Marketing, Advertising, Madison Avenue

Are Health Magazines Healthy

By Jim Whelan,

Monday, August 27, 2007

I was looking through a bunch of health magazinesthat came across my desk the other day, and acouple of questions came to mind.

I was thumbing through an article called "GroovyGoodness," and it had a recipe for spiced caramelcorn. I thunk to myself, "Is that healthy?"

Now, maybe it is healthier the caramel corn inthe five pound tubs favored by whale walkers, butI'ma stickin to my guns, is it healthy?

I say no.

Are Sun Chips healthy?

How about Vitamin Water?

Or Erin Baker's Wholesome Baked Goods?

Juicy Juice?

Can healthy eating prevail against Madison Avenue?

(Can your business be healthy if you're notspending your adverising budget with us here atThe Joan Randall Agency? Call us at 406 207 3124and start using your greens the right way.)

Can you be healthy and a vegetarian?

My personal answer to that is no.

I'm sure that will set some vegetarians on fire, butthe truth is the body was designed to have some meat,and if you don't have it, at some point you're goingto get sick.

I can just see the Vegan Army on the march towardmy house, getting ready to set it aflame. But in myopinion, and that's what counts here, vegans will getsick even earlier. I know this because I have Vegar. It'salmost like radar, except it works on Vegans. I canusually identify a Vegan very quickly out of a large crowdof people.

It isn't hard, and I think any number of people can developthis skill without working at it very hard. You just have touse your nose.

Vegans give off this kind of moldy cabbage odor, andusually they have very poor posture. It's because theydon't get enough protein to stand up straight. It's toomuch work for their muscles, if they have any at all.Now there are exceptions to the rule, but not many.They also whine and carry on about nearly everything.That's because their supposedly healthy body is in aconstant state of inflammation from not eating anymeat.

If you want to see the definition of soft, take a ganderat a vegan gathering, where you can see the results oftoo much starch.

Back to the question, can healthy eating prevail againstMadison Avenue?

Yes.

I saw evidence of it everywhere I walked in New York aweek or two ago. Fresh juice everywhere. Fresh fruiteverywhere. Kosher Falafel. Deli's with all kinds of goodwholesome food.

If you want to eat at McDonalds's, that's your choice.But it isn't like you don't have any others. This will takea little longer to trickle down to middle America, but it'son the way.

And not a minute too soon.

From the big saddle,
Jim Whelan

P.S. Just remember, The Fizz Makes It Fun. That's thetag line of a new health drink for kids, modeled after theold Alka Seltzer ad. It's caffeine free, sugar free, andpacked with 100% of the RDA of vitamin C. I wonder whatother chemicals are in there? But they have root beer.

The Joan Randall Agency is caffeine free, sugar free,and 100% on the ball all the time. Call the cowboys at206 407 3124, and make your business health a priority.


Jim Whelan is the chief cowboy of the Joan Randall Agency. The Joan Randall Agency, specializing in internet advertising, print media, Publicity Services, Web site development, banner creation and email campaign services.letters@canadafreepress.com

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