Canadian Election
Campaign Chuckles
ON MEETING MINNA AT MAIN SUBWAY: AN EAST SIDE STORY
Maria, Maria,
I’ve just met an MP named Maria
And suddenly the change no longer seems so strange to me.
I’ve just met an MP named Maria
And now the pain will never be the same you see
Maria, Maria,
Soon I will no longer see her
After the election where ever will she be?
Will she haunt local ravines or just be more obscener?
Maria, Maria
Say it loud and you’ll hear taxpayers complaining:
We keep paying and paying and paying
Say it soft and for her departure they’re praying
Maria! Maria! Maria!
I’m sure I won’t miss Maria.
Ambassador Who???
Paul Martin got so carried away by his phoney bluster on the United States that he insulted the US Ambassador while trying to compliment him.Ý
ÝMartin stuttered: "Let me be clear, I have a great deal of respect for Ambassador Wilson."
Ambassador who?Ý Last we checked, Ambassador David Wilkins was the U.S. Ambassador to Canada.Ý
ÝWas this what Martin had in mind when he promised to conduct "our bilateral relations…on a far more sophisticated basis than it has been to date."
(Canadian Press Dinner in Toronto, April 30, 2003.)
Martin Makes His Pitch to Asian Canadian Voters
"Sometimes election campaigns can travel to so many cities and towns in a day it gets hard to remember what time it is or where you are. But Prime Minister Paul Martin appeared to forget what country he was in yesterday. During a series of interviews with Chinese media organizations, Mr. Martin attempted to explain to the interviewer how important the Chinese Canadian community is to the country. In fact, he announced that Canada has geographically moved its borders to be closer to them. "What we really are saying is we're a major Asian country," Mr. Martin told Omni TV, to roars of laughter from the Canadian media watching the interview."
How to become prime minister, by Kim Campbell
Kim Campbell, Canada’s prime minister for a whole 5 months back in 1993, said that she doesn’t think Stephen Harper will become Canada’s next PM. In an interview given at the London School of Economics where she was delivering a speech, Campbell said that Harper and his party are too socially conservative and their non-fiscal policies frighten many people.
After ascending to the leadership of the Progressive Conservative Party in June 1993, Campbell called an election shortly thereafter, at a time when despite the fact that Canadians were fed up with Brian Mulroney, the Tories were leading in the polls. The November election saw the once great party of John A. Macdonald reduced to two seats; an amazing feat that led to the party’s eventual demise.
Now the woman who famously stated that an election campaign was not the time to discuss serious issues thinks she knows the issues well enough to predict Harper can’t win.
On the other hand, Kim Campbell does know about losing.
Flags of convenience
If there is one campaign topic where Prime Minister Paul Martin should exercise a little caution, it's flag-waving patriotism. Trying to take advantage of Conservative leader Stephen Harper's answer to a reporter about whether he loved Canada, Martin came out on the attack, indicating that while Harper's reply was a tad lukewarm, he unequivocally loves Canada. The PM ran straight into Conservative MP Jason Kenney, who raised questions about Martin's past business practices with his former firm, Canada Steamship Lines. CSL ships ply the waters of the world under "flags of convenience". Instead of the Maple Leaf, CSL vessels fly the flags of countries such as the Bahamas and Liberia. Kenney showed up at a press conference on Wednesday, dramatically unfurled the flag of Liberia and accused the prime minister of trying to wrap himself in the flag. Guess his advisers didn't clue in their candidate about people in glass houses not throwing stones.
Belinda - you're a Liberal now
Belinda Stronach did what many good MPs are doing a day after the election was called; she wrote a letter to her 2004 volunteers thanking them for their work and asking them to help her during the current campaign.
It didn't seem to matter to the Newmarket-Aurora rookie MP that since the last election she left the Conservative Party and crossed the floor to sit as a Liberal cabinet minister.
She seems to be of the opinion that all of her volunteers are as shallow and opportunistic as she is. Shocking as it may be, some Conservative Party stalwarts just don't want to work for a Liberal.
Belinda - you always were a liberal. But remember, you're a Liberal now. You might want to keep that in mind.
Don't leave things until the last minute
It didn't take too long after the writ was dropped for the campaign to heat up in Toronto's Trinity-Spadina riding. Olivia Chow (a.k.a. Mrs. Jack Layon) who is making her third try for the NDP wasted no time in attacking Liberal incumbent Tony Ianno over Toronto issues such as the City Centre Airport.
Ianno came back swinging saying the airport didn't seem to be a priority last spring when the NDP could have added that issue to their list of demands to prop up the Liberal government. Ianno was quoted as asking, "Why didn't they bring that up when it counted?"
This from a guy whose party has been in power for 12 years but suddenly discovered in the last 2 weeks that it was necessary to spend an additional $24 billion. And if you vote them out of office, preventing them from spending it, Canada as we know it will cease to exist.
Paulie’s blankie
Wives will tell you that there are some husbands who will not part with certain items of clothing, no matter how worn, tattered and old and no matter how loud the complaints.
Prime Minister Paul Martin’s wife, Sheila must have shuddered every time she saw hubby heading out the door in the old green hunting jacket that some wags dared describe as "Uncle Paulie’s blankie".
With the non-confidence vote against his Liberal government, some advisors told the PM to lose the old jacket, pronto! They did not want their candidate to upstage Conservative Leader Stephen Harper, who complete with black cowboy hat and turned-up-at-the-toe black boots, showed up at a barbecue last summer as a not very cool Johnny Cash look-alike. So the guy, who can’t cast off the nickname "Mr. Dithers", replaced the reviled jacket with a new one–an exact replica of the old green jacket
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