-Satire Just back from his “World Groveling Tour” President Obama invited Stoos Views’ Chief White House Correspondent, Hugh Betcha, to his room at Bethesda Naval Hospital where Obama is recovering from self inflicted back injuries received while apologizing for the United States in Europe, the Middle East, and Turkey. “I guess I overdid it with the Cat O’ Nine Tails last week,” the President admitted, “but I thought that a little medieval self flagellation would impress the Europeans and show them that we are truly sorry for all of our past sins. But, boy does that thing hurt,” he said, pointing to the painful lash wounds on his back which were being treated by the President’s doctors. The President, referring to the wounds received during one rather embarrassing moment when he took off his shirt and beat his back repeatedly with this bizarre torture device in a symbolic mea culpa for everything the United States has done the past two centuries, grimaced in pain as he closed his hospital gown. “While that was very painful,” he exclaimed, “I think the Europeans were impressed. I am sure they will like us now.”

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