-Satire- An Exclusive Report by Hugh Betcha, Ace Reporter
It was a cold and blustery day in downtown Wynstone, South Dakota—where the air is clean, the crime rate low, and the people vote red—as Hugh Betcha, Ace Reporter for the Stoos Views International Media Conglomerate shoveled the Global Warming off his driveway and chipped it off the windshield of his F-250 pickup. As the diesel engine turned over reluctantly in the 20 below air, Hugh received a rather unexpected call. But, then again, Hugh—winner of the 2012 “Most Trusted Name in News” awarded by MSNBC, and a man who walks with kings and princes, with unique access to both sides of the aisle in Foggy Bottom--was used to the unexpected. With easy access to Ahmadinejad, Obama, Putin, and other world leaders, it was not unusual for Hugh to receive calls from political figures, despots and socialists, like the President, at any hour of the day. After all, if you wanted to make headlines, Betcha was the man to call.
